Surrealism

So, I’m sat in this classroom today surrounded by people at least 40 years my senior and I couldn’t help but think, ‘How the hell did I end up here?’

I had to attend this class as part of the preparation for my hip surgery. They get a bunch of patients together who have upcoming hip replacements and a physio and member of the home care team talk to you about what to expect. It was actually rather interesting and informative, but it didn’t stop the embarrassment of having to sit there whilst practically everyone stared at me wondering what I was doing there. Perhaps it’s a little strange for older people to grasp that they are not the only ones who need surgery to replace dodgy joints. I almost felt as if they were thinking I had no right to be there, rather than passing me sympathetic looks. The same type of looks I get when I park in a disabled spot I guess. I do try and relate to these people but sometimes, like today when I’m feeling quite low anyway, I just want to scream ‘it’s none of your business what’s wrong with me so stop making me feel uncomfortable!’

I got the same confused and arrogant response from the receptionist when I booked in. I had no idea what the appointment was for and I wasn’t told it was a class so she stared at me and asked ‘Do you know who your appointment is with?’, ‘No, sorry’, I replied, ‘I think the secretary said hip clinic..?’

‘But that’s only for patients having replacement surgery’ she stared at me blankly.

‘Yep, that’s me,’ I corrected her. What is wrong with these people?!

I left feeling that the whole experience was a bit surreal. Even though I know this is all happening, it doesn’t quite feel like reality... maybe it’s the ridiculous amount of painkillers I am on right now.

I had a nasty reminder this weekend of why I cannot drink anymore. I had some of my very best friends come visit and it’s just sociable to have a drink, right? Well, one drink turned into quite a few and to be honest I was having a great time and found the whole evening hilarious. I sure as hell suffered for it. I was sick (a lot) and felt incredibly horrendous for the next couple of days (in fact I’m still feeling it now) but that’s the price I have to pay if I want to join in with friends these days (and to be honest it was kinda worth it!)

I have realised that I shouldn’t put my body through that, though, especially with everything that is going on at the moment. It was a bit of an escape at the weekend, having a drink to forget about all the crap that has come about. I do miss the days where the horrendous hangovers were fixed by the time I forced myself to eat a fry up (this isn’t the case anymore, it totally messes up my whole body and I feel like I have flu for about a week afterwards).

Anyways, after a weekend of fun and the few days of hell that followed its back to reality... and trying to figure out how to run a business with a new hip. Answers on a postcard please.