I am feeling horribly frustrated today. I am not even sure why, I just have that horrible restless feeling where you need to do something but you can’t think of what to do. The thing is, I am in pain and extremely tired so I can’t even do anything anyway. I guess I am just bored, waiting for something to happen. The snow has fallen in its bucket loads over the past two days leaving my car stuck in a white tomb. It requires far too much effort to dig it out and the roads are too dangerous to drive on anyway. The temperature is freezing so it means walking is out of the question too.
So far, I have had a pretty good weekend. I shared a night in with the boy, ate some good food, did some Christmas shopping in the snow (all very festive) and now I have come to a grinding halt. I guess I am not used to doing too much so when I get to do things I get myself on a roll and want to do as much as possible. What is there to do really when you have exhausted all of your tasks?
I have been concentrating on looking forward to the Christmas festivities; I have even devised a quiz for the family on Christmas Day to keep me entertained. I suppose if you are a working person you don’t have much free time to squeeze everything into. However, when you can’t work (like me), all your time is free and you have to space things out so you don’t get horribly bored. I simply cannot wait until I am able to return to some form of work. Keeping busy keeps my mind off things. It makes me feel valued and satisfied. I think I have pestered charities enough for volunteer work this week.
The good news to report is that I have had some very positive feedback from a publisher regarding the book I have written, so if they do decide to publish it (fingers and toes awkwardly crossed) I will have something else to do with all this free time. I do enjoy the odd ‘sitting around’ hour or two but after nearly a year and a half, I have come to the end of my tether. I think I will go find some loose buttons to sew on or some family and friends to annoy with my moaning. Oh and by the way (in case you had forgotten) it’s Christmas in six days! (Id very much like to use my free time to open presents...)